jump to navigation

1368) Published: Journal: 1/10/10, Lethal Weapon September 30, 2010

Posted by pete1844 in Journal.
add a comment
Istiqlal, 5th Mashiyyat, 167 BE
The Independence and Light of Will
Friday, 1st October, 2010 AD
.
1368) 1/10/10, Lethal Weapon
Martin Riggs played by Mel Gibson in the above trilogy or quadrilogy is pissed that his wife Victoria, born in 1953, was murdered by Africaaner bigots. Then in the second film they kill his new love played by Patsy Kensit. His partner played by Danny Glover complains that God hates him since he’s getting a hard time, at which Riggs advises him, “Hate Him back, it works for me!” I can identify with Riggs in that. I have an unread book on my shelf called “Loves of Courage”. What about lives of hatred of people given a hard time by God with no respite, like Riggs?
.
Blog Stats for 1/10:-
1 look at the Home Page
1 look at “1024) Essay, A Corollary (17 9 10)”
1 look at “1087) Essay, Who is Nightingale? (17/12/09 and 1/10/10)”
.
Today’s Plan:-
09:30 ITQ, nope, spitting blood with rage at failure to effectively save tons of good stuff to posts for 29/9 and 30/9, rage all directed at God
12:40 flying visit to MECO to meet Muslims from Dubai, before going to JR; met Ali and had a good chat, but no time to chat with as well as meet dozens of youngsters from Dubai
13:45 Trauma Unit, A & E, JR-legoland, have to attend for an op on Monday to have my finger straightened, possibly with an internal wire or metal splint

Daily:- “You hit a milestone of sorts today — though you might not have seen it coming. In fact, your great energy ensures that you get something you want, no matter how unlikely it seemed yesterday.” 09:30, 1/10:- Oh, I’ve got tons of energy alright, a vehement hatred and anger all directed at God. 19:08, 1/10 Its good that by the time I was reading “Run, baby, run” again waiting in the Trauma Unit, the anger had dissipated again.

Single’s:- “You can easily intuit what people are thinking today — which should really come in handy when it comes to your love life. Read their body language and stay open to what’s left unsaid.” 10:28, 1/10:- Left unsaid, what “everything”? Not a single word of explanation since a text message in March 2007, “I’ll reply to ur e-mail, when the time is right”. I’m waiting! 19:10, 1/10:- Harsh, rude, impatient, ugly! Go gentle into that dark night, Pete!

Couple’s:- “You’re going to figure out something that has always bothered you about your sweetheart — and the answer will be much simpler than you would have ever imagined.” 10:30, 1/10:- Really? I can’t WAIT to find out what it is!

Daily Forecast:- “Say it Now”:- “The part in the ceremony where the officiating preacher, justice or rabbi asks for participants to either voice objections or ‘forever hold your peace’? Well, you might not be at a wedding, but the choice is the same: speak now or wish you did for the rest of your life. Bet you won’t be able to keep quiet.” 10:46, 1/10:- I FEEL, strongly, that there’s a bond between our souls that simply won’t go away, will not and cannot be ignored, and that whether its convenient or not, comfortable or not, we two ought to re-establish communications, even behind several thousands of miles of electronic wiring and satellite comm links, and get to know about each others’ characters; any other course of action will leave us both bitter, twisted, wasted, unfulfilled, and we would both then spend the rest of our lives waiting for death. The choice is there, the offer stands; bloody well take it with both hands! Love:- “Today’s diary entry: Today was totally hedonistic. I enjoyed every single second so much that I thought I’d overdose on happiness. Can I do it again tomorrow?” Energy: “Step away from the machinery — and that includes the vehicle (especially if it’s red), the kitchen utensils and even the knitting needles. No, this is not a test.” 11:01, 1/10:- Does that apply to laptops? Yes? Too bad, I’m ignoring the warning. Career:- “You can have absolutely everything you want from the higher-ups. They’ll be happy to support and advise you, and tip you on how to get where you want to go.” 11:00, 1/10:- And what about that one person exactly on my own level; is SHE going to help too?

Advertisements

1367) Published: Journal: 30/9/10, 28 Crash by Susie Quatro September 30, 2010

Posted by pete1844 in Journal.
add a comment
Istijlal, 4th Mashiyyat, 167 BE
The Majesty and Grandeur of Will
Thursday, 30th September, 2010 AD
.
1367) 30/9/10, 28 Crash by Susie Quatro
48 Wilsdon Way crash on 28th September at about 09:50 am in Summertown. “48 Crash” was a hit single by feisty glam rock star tom-boy Susie Quatro in the ’70s. At 09:50 I was hareing at warp factor 20 in a southerly direction past the Co-op in Summertown, with a large vehicle on my right blocking the view. On encountering a pedestrian crossing, a bicycle, unannounced, appeared from the right, in front of the vehicle, and then in front of yours truly. To avoid an RTC, (Road Traffic Collision) I slammed on the brakes, but I’d forgotten the advice concerning “emergency stops” in my driving lessons, and my bike brakes were VERY good, so whereas the bike stopped, I did not, and proceeded unimpaired over the handlebars and into the concrete, whereupon, I broke a small bone in my left hand, above my little finger, and a lump which then appeared, gave a hint of the bone’s brokenness. I tried cycling to the JR, but the bike would not work. I tried to fix it, but the chain was jammed behind a nut, and I couldn’t dislodge it. A bike shop not 10 yards away, couldn’t get it to budge either, and since other parts had to be removed to facilitate the emancipation of the chain, i.e. the chain guard, I had to leave my bike there, to be picked up later at 16 o’clock, and proceed by bus to the JR A & E, where I spent several excited hours reading “Run, Baby, Run” not “Run, rabbit, run” by Nicky Cruz, about his own conversion to the first Gospel, after having led a murderous, vicious gang called the Mau Maus in Brooklyn, New York in 1958.
.
Blog Stats for 30/9:-
2 looks at the Home Page
1 look at “1220) Poem, Comfortably Numb? (25 3 10)”
.
Today’s Plan:-
leave early, maybe 08:30, to get buses to Cowley Road, very time-consuming negotiating the road works in Banbury Road, not such a problem for bicycles
09:30 ITQ with EMBS, nearly finished Word, just a mail-merge project to go before being examined
16:07 Westgate Net-surfing, blog slightly more up-to-date
later dinner with Hilary, kheili khoshmazeh meal of pasta with mushrooms and then a good chat
back at home, watched “Mock the Week”

17:03, 30/9:- After Tuesday’s crash, with my left hand itching like billyo under a plaster cast, having to waste an unconscionable amount of time lumbering around at a snail’s pace in buses, not to mention the appalling reduction in my manual dexterity, I seem to be relentlessly chipper and upbeat at the moment. The crash was a lesson from Him to slow down, lose some speed, lose some passion, lose the anger and rage, chill out, cool down, take it easy, relax, etc. And I have. While I’m spending all my time taking care of business, since it all takes far longer with only one fully operational hand, there’s no time to try bending other people’s ears and pressure them to do things they know full well that its not yet time to act out. HE is SO wise! And I’m just a hot-headed, head-strong teenager, allegedly! So, He’s taken over and left me with the light clerical duties, for a while. That’s a wait off my mind!

Daily:- “You don’t always have to be in control of every situation — your energy today actually requires that you let go a little, in fact. See if your peers can take over some aspects of today’s work.”

Single’s:- “Your feelings about an upcoming decision are crystallizing now. Open up to both your analytical side and your deeper intuition — this effort is going to require them to both work together.” 11:13, 1/10:- An upcoming decision of whom? Your decision? Your decision to re-establish comms between us, break through the ice, and ignite that blue touch paper? Mind you, with these rocket-propelled forms of transport, I will advise you, “Fasten your seat-belt! Its gonna  be a hellava ride! Enjoy! I feel the need for speed!

Couple’s:- “You need to make sure you’re spending some serious time with your honey today — you’ve both got lots to talk about! Start things off light, but expect to go into deep territory pretty quickly.” 17:11, 30/9:- I re-read “847) The Rise of the Machines”, just now; not much has changed in that regard since 10th June 2009. Sarah Connor and Kathryn Brewster are still central to my metaphorical and symbolic cosmology! And deeper into my foundation of cosmological influences, Super Marionation is even more fundamental. This flat screen, called “Lenovo” at Westgate library even “speaks to me” in that its the “Leonov” that took Helen Mirren from one side of the Iron Curtain, and the Twin Yanks Rod Schneider and John Lithgow from the other side of the East/West divide towards Jupiter in “2010: The Year We Make Contact” in order to figure out what went wrong with Hal (interference from the global elite) and to play a part in the unification of mankind and the establishment of world peace, after Jupiter is born again as a second sun to light up the night sky and give new life to Europe, I mean Europa. But its not down to the will of Jupiter; its the will of the “Monolith” or “God” that Jupiter be born again, into incandescent brilliance, a brilliant star! QED! And who is David Bowman, dressed in his red astronaut’s suit? Baha’u’llah on His Crimson Arc, I suppose, ruling the world from the House of Jacob? And who am I, but a lowly tin can called Pioneer, transformed, perhaps, allegedly, by an alien civilization, in a solar system far, far away, and sent back to find its Creator, renamed as P’eer. Or Pierre, as they would pronounce it in France, or by Steve! It all fits together like a huge jig-saw puzzle, allegedly! References to a myriad sci-fi dramas spanning the last 30 years, available on receipt of a stamp-addressed envelope!

Daily Forecast:- “Wit, Charm and Persuasion”:- “You’ve been temporarily endowed with superpowers. The ability to turn mere sounds into poetry, music and mesmerizing stories will be yours for the next 24 hours or so. Better carry throat lozenges, because once word gets around, you won’t be able to turn the fans away without a demonstration.” Love:- “Today’s diary entry: Today was totally hedonistic. I enjoyed every single second so much that I thought I’d overdose on happiness. Can I do it again tomorrow?” Energy:- “Exercise is a wonderful thing, but your energy would be better spent on intellectual and verbal gymnastics right now. You’ll be a shoo-in for the gold.” Career:- “It’s easy. It’s too easy, in fact. Does that mean you shouldn’t take the position that’s been offered on a silver platter? Heck, no. Just live up to their confidence.” 11:16, 1/10:- What, YOU have confidence in ME? Glad to hear it! Do I have confidence in you? Er, yes, why, was there ever any doubt in your mind about that? Why do I have confidence in you? Well, after being tutored by you in Book 5, why would I have any doubt about it. It became obvious, undeniable, as plain as day. Why don’t you understand, or are you just pretending not to understand? Stop acting for a change, and be yourself.

1366) Published: Journal: 29/9/10, Aftermath September 28, 2010

Posted by pete1844 in Journal.
add a comment
‘Idal, 3rd Mashiyyat, 167 BE
The Justice and Beauty of Will
Wednesday, 29th September, 2010 AD
.
1366) 29/9/10, Aftermath
.
Blog Stats for 29/9:-
1 look at the Home Page
1 look at “847) Poem, The Rise of the Machines (10 6 09)”
.
Today’s Plan:-
09:30 Interview with Catherine Keys by telephone for the Condition Management Programme at Shaw Trust, call not received on land-line
13:00 MIND Kaleidoscope Centre in Kidlington on Money Management
19:30 Exeter Hall in Kidlington for a Cherwell District Council meeting about anaerobic digestion and composting promoted by Kidlington versus Climate Change

Daily:- “The fine print is being even more annoying than usual — but you have to go through the motions and make sure that you’re handling it properly anyway. The day should fly by once that’s past.”

Single’s:- “If you want to take an online flirtation into real life or ask out that local hottie, you need to engage them in a sweet, friendly way, take in a little more information and then make your move.”

Couple’s:- “You like to keep your private life private early on in the day, but by the evening, you’re actually looking forward to getting out there and mixing it up. Your sweetheart loves that you’re so versatile right now.”


1365) Published: Journal: 28/8/10, Bleeding, Pleading, Needing September 28, 2010

Posted by pete1844 in Journal.
add a comment
Fidal, 2nd Mashiyyat, 167 BE
The Grace and Glory of Will
Tuesday, 28th September, 2010 AD
.
1365) 28/8/10, Bleeding, Pleading, Needing
.
Blog Stats for 28/8:-
9 looks at the Home Page
2 looks at “1366) Journal, 29/9/10, Aftermath
searched “betty goode baha’i”
.
Today’s Plan:-
10:00 to 11:30 CV Writing workshop at Shaw Trust
followed by ITQ at EMBS until 15:00
18:30 Launch of Cherwell Council of Faiths at Banbury Town Hall

“And, finally, let these soul-stirring words of Bahá’u’lláh, as they pursue their course throughout the length and breadth of the southern American continent, be ever ready on their lips, a solace to their hearts, a light on their path, a companion in their loneliness, and a daily sustenance in their journeys: “O wayfarer in the path of God! Take thou thy portion of the ocean of His grace, and deprive not thyself of the things that lie hidden in its depths…. A dewdrop out of this ocean would, if shed upon all that are in the heavens and on earth, suffice to enrich them with the bounty of God, the Almighty, the All-Knowing, the All-Wise. With the hands of renunciation draw forth from its life-giving waters, and sprinkle therewith all created things, that they may be cleansed from all man-made limitations, and may approach the mighty seat of God, this hallowed and resplendent Spot. Be not grieved if thou performest it thyself alone. Let God be all-sufficient for thee…. Proclaim the Cause of thy Lord unto all who are in the heavens and on the earth. Should any man respond to thy call, lay bare before him the pearls of the wisdom of the Lord, thy God, which His Spirit hath sent down upon thee, and be thou of them that truly believe. And should anyone reject thy offer, turn thou away from him, and put thy trust and confidence in the Lord of all worlds. By the righteousness of God! Whoso openeth his lips in this day, and maketh mention of the name of his Lord, the hosts of Divine inspiration shall descend upon him from the heaven of my name, the All-Knowing, the All-Wise. On him shall also descend the Concourse on high, each bearing aloft a chalice of pure light. Thus hath it been foreordained in the realm of God’s Revelation, by the behest of Him Who is the All-Glorious, the Most Powerful.” (Shoghi Effendi, “The Advent of Divine Justice”, page 61) 07:16, 28/9:- If He is all-sufficient unto me, why am I crying my eyes out for her? Am I insane? Insanely human? Maybe an imbecile?

“11:18 Therefore shall ye lay up these my words in your heart and in your soul, and bind them for a sign upon your hand, that they may be as frontlets between your eyes.” (King James Bible, Deuteronomy)

“11:18 Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads.” (New International Version, Bible, Deuteronomy)

Mission India:- “The Word of God cannot get to your mind and from your mind to your heart unless it is first in your hands and in front of your eyes. How is this planner helping you get God’s Word into your everyday life?” 07:00, 28/9:- At the moment, I feel so livid with irascibility, rage and anger, that His Word does nothing but make the situation worse. My left hand itches with an insect bite, my left shoulder has sharp stabbing pains which are totally unpredictable, my nose is running with a low-level cold, everything around me seems to exacerbate my extreme grumpiness and bad-tempered-ness. Of all the Baha’is only Nur and Soraya do NOT make me even more livid with anger. THEY are a delight. All the others feel with me with anger and grieve. Except for Pete Hulme, who seems to genuinely sympathize with me. I feel God is tormenting me. Why do I feel that? Because I am having a temper tantrum. Why? Because I’m not getting any blo0dy attention. Whose attention do you want? No 6. Why do you want her attention? Because I love her. Yep, that’s what is going on. Complete stalemate, frustration, exasperation. And what does God say? Suffer, be crucified, DIE!

Daily:- “Your obsessive nature helps you out today as you spot a flaw in a major plan or just an outlying data point that could change everything. Your energy isn’t quite up to fixing it but you can alert the right people.” 07:17, 28/9:- What flaw? I see no flaw, just a God tormenting me with a test I can only just endure without being hospitalized, for the 6th time. I have already alerted Pete Hulme who can do nothing but recommend therapies that the NHS doesn’t seem to have the resources to supply, or for me to afford privately, and anyway no amount of therapy can cure me. The only cure that can deliver me is her favour, and she will not lift a finger to help. I see no way out of this stalemate until she makes a move towards me, and I see no sign that she is prepared to do a single thing.

Single’s:- “The best icebreaker is almost certainly not to ask what someone likes about their gig or what they majored in. Ask something offbeat that also says something positive about you. You’ve got quite a mind for details!”

Couple’s: “You’re afraid of being cheesy when it comes to expressing romantic sentiments, but don’t let that stop you. Your sweetheart will understand (and appreciate) the feeling behind them. Say what needs to be said.” 07:23, 28/9:- PLEASE make contact. I feel my sanity is ebbing away again, starving for you, and not placatable by anything else but you, and God Himself cannot satisfy me, unless He allows and causes you to give me some of your attention. I NEED you.

Daily Forecast:- “Wit, Charm and Persuasion” “You’ve been temporarily endowed with superpowers. The ability to turn mere sounds into poetry, music and mesmerizing stories will be yours for the next 24 hours or so. Better carry throat lozenges, because once word gets around, you won’t be able to turn the fans away without a demonstration.” Love:- “Today’s diary entry: Today was totally hedonistic. I enjoyed every single second so much that I thought I’d overdose on happiness. Can I do it again tomorrow?” Energy:- “You’re just not fit for human consumption right now. You know it, and everyone who crosses paths with you will know it, too. Hiding out at home wouldn’t hurt.” Career:- “It’s easy. It’s too easy, in fact. Does that mean you shouldn’t take the position that’s been offered on a silver platter? Heck, no. Just live up to their confidence.”


1364) Published: Journal: 27/9/10, Bull in a China shop September 26, 2010

Posted by pete1844 in Journal.
add a comment
Kamal, 1st Mashiyyat, 167 BE
The Perfection and Splendour of Will
Monday, 27th September, 2010 AD
.
1364) 27/9/10,
.
Blog Stats for 27/9:-
2 looks at the Home Page
1 look at “1220) Poem, Comfortably Numb? (25 3 10)”
.
Today’s Plan:-
09:00 Restore
15:00 Open Door
17:00 Chinese, replaced by 19 Day Feast of Mashiyyat in Oxford at Joy’s on China

“39. O SON OF MAN! Neglect not My commandments if thou lovest My beauty, and forget not My counsels if thou wouldst attain My good pleasure.” (Baha’u’llah, The Arabic Hidden Words)

“1:8 First, I thank my God through Jesus Christ for you all, that your faith is spoken of throughout the whole world.” (King James Bible, Romans)

Mission India:- “Can you imagine someone thanking God for you because your faith – your story – is being shared with people all over the world? It could happen. God uses ordinary people like you to spread His love. How has God used your faith story to reach others?” 00:25, 27/9:- I have no idea.

Daily:- “You’re getting greedy today, though there’s no telling if anyone else notices. It may be a good time for you to go for something big, if only to feel a little better about your capabilities.”

Single’s:- “Love isn’t a competition, so if it feels like one to you, try to reexamine the people, priorities and events involved. A smart, more objective friend can help you see things in a new light.”

Couple’s:- “Although life is good for you, it could always be better. You can see that there’s some stuff you need to work on with sweetie, so why not try to start that conversation now?”

Daily Forecast:- “Ready, Aim … Wait” “It might be tempting to let your impulses lead you, leaving discretion to those you’ll think of as far less bold. Don’t do that. The time is just not right to take action. Not yet. Wait, just for a little while. It will definitely be worth it.” Love:- “A Vegas chapel may seem like the perfect solution to your rather pressing dilemma, but there’s another option you haven’t considered — and, blessedly, it won’t involve an Elvis look-alike.” Energy:- “You’re just not fit for human consumption right now. You know it, and everyone who crosses paths with you will know it, too. Hiding out at home wouldn’t hurt.” Career:- “It’s easy. It’s too easy, in fact. Does that mean you shouldn’t take the position that’s been offered on a silver platter? Heck, no. Just live up to their confidence.”

06:26, 27/9:- I wrote and typed at length on the above yesterday at Westgate but it wasn’t saved which makes the start to today one of spitting blood with rage again. Thanks, God! He never allows me to save the best stuff.

1363) Published: Journal: 26/10/10, Balanced, realistic, unfulfilled, cynical, pessismistic September 25, 2010

Posted by pete1844 in Journal.
add a comment
Jamal, 19th ‘Izzat, 167 BE
The Beauty and Loftiness of Might
Sunday, 26th September, 2010 AD
.
1363) Balanced, realistic, unfulfilled, cynical, pessimistic
or Ininstalled and Deleted Software
.
Blog Stats for 26/9:-
1 look at the Home Page
1 look at “1220) Poem, Comfortably Numb (25 3 10)”
.
Today’s Plan:-
10:30 St Aldate’s, nope, depressed, stayed in bed
17:00 North Oxon Unity Feast, Begbroke, went, sullen, but perked up at the end to slag off passionately with righteous anger, the global elite

07:53, 26/9:- After waking up this morning, my mind is 100% taken up with software now uninstalled and deleted, any memory files containing information about No 6, and any associated software such as love, faith, joy, happiness or humour have been deleted. And my anger, hatred and contempt software seems now to be directing its venom towards any “Ruhi bullies” whenever and wherever they are to be found. And the consequences? I couldn’t give a tinker’s cuss about the consequences.23:48, 26/9:- As Q would say, “Temper, temper, mon capitaine!”

“It is my hope that the Nineteen Day Feast may become firmly established and organized so that the holy realities are behind this meeting may leave behind all prejudices and conflict, and make their hearts as a treasury of love. Even if there is the slightest feeling between certain souls — a lack of love — it must be made to entirely disappear. There must be the utmost translucency and purity of intention.

“They must enjoy the love of God, acquire the power for the promotion of the happiness of mankind and the Word of God. With such high mention must this Feast become an established institution. When they gather in this meeting, all those present must turn their faces toward the Kingdom of Abha, and from their hearts supplicate, invoke and entreat toward the lofty throne, beg of God’s forgiveness for all shortcomings, read the teachings and arise to His service.” (compilation, “Seeking the Light of the Kingdom”, page 10).

Daily:- “You may be somewhat too attached to a person, place or thing — and you need to walk away from it! That doesn’t mean abandoning it forever, just finding a way to lessen its hold on your mind.” 23:49, 26/9:- Yes, Pete, stop being so bloody obsessive, its not funny!

Single’s:- “You might not care much how you appear right now, and if anything is irritating you, you don’t hold back. Anyone who doesn’t respect your P.O.V. isn’t right for you anyway, so walk away.” 23:50, 26/9:- What does POV stand for? Point Of View! Oh I see, Yes I agree completely! Walk on by!

Couple’s:- “Today is perfect for working on your relationship. Plan a quiet celebration if you’re content with the status quo. Let sweetie know exactly how you’re feeling!” 23:52, 26/9: Well, No 6, its another instance of having a filthy temper, but it blowing over quite quickly, yet again. Remind you of anyone?

Daily Forecast:- Creavity and fun, same as yesterday. Love:- “It will be far too easy for them to fall off the pedestal you erected. You can prevent that by convincing yourself that imperfection is what makes us interesting to others.” 23:56, 26/9:- We’ve been over this before, its not the goddess on the pedestal that I adore, its the flawed human being, warts and speckles n all that I adore. It may seem that the image of you I put forward is a goddess, but that’s just an expression of affection; the you that I love is the real you, not airbrushed, not idealized, not the publicity shot, not the public image, the real you, under the surface, only witnessed at first hand, when the superficial facade was absent, when you tutored me in Book 5. I know part of that was a performance, but the real you shone through as well, and well, I couldn’t help falling in love with you, the real you. Its quite simple, really. You still don’t believe me, think I’m infatuated? Well I think that such a perception is fatuous. “I may not be a smart man, but I know what love is” (Forrest Gump)! Energy and Career, same as yesterday.

1362) Published: Journal: 25/9/10, Gutted September 24, 2010

Posted by pete1844 in Journal.
add a comment
Jalal, 18th ‘Izzat, 167 BE
The Glory and Dominion of Might
Saturday, 25th September, 2010 AD
.
1362) 25/9/10, Gutted
.
Blog Stats for 25/9:-
2 looks at “1360) Journal, 23/9/10, Hard-working and Enthusiastic (23/9/10)”
.
Today’s Plan:-
10:00 call on Hilary to explore the Kidlington market, 09:07, 25/9:- called it off this morning, since I feel gutted to be without the company of No 6, and need to spend the day alone, with just my aching heart to keep me company. 15:59, 25/9:- And I’ve only just had a shower, since there was no reason to get up, until I became bored with lying in bed. An SMS exchange with BA on Skype has finally said what we both knew since the beginning, and possibly there is now a fault-line between our two realities which will become an unbridgeable abyss. So be it. 16:44, 25/9:- Kate Bush; “The Sensual World”, “Walk Straight Down the Middle”, “he thought he was going to die but he didn’t, and she thought she just couldn’t cope but she did, we thought it would be so hard but it wasn’t, it wasn’t easy at all.” 07:51, 26/9:- Rang friends in Hereford and Bristol who are NOT Ruhi bullies and therefore do not regard me with hatred and contempt, and then a helpline to deal with despair, and tomorrow, listening to Led Zeppelin to gain clarity of mind, as opposed to the confusion and ambiguity of Kate Bush, is another day.
.

” Section 97. There are certain pillars which have been established as the unshakeable supports of the Faith of God. The mightiest of these is learning and the use of the mind, the expansion of consciousness, and insight into the realities of the universe and the hidden mysteries of Almighty God.

To promote knowledge is thus an inescapable duty imposed on every one of the friends of God. It is incumbent upon that Spiritual Assembly, that assemblage of God, to exert every effort to educate the children, so that from infancy they will be trained in Bahá’í conduct and the ways of God, and will, even as young plants, thrive and flourish in the soft-flowing waters that are the counsels and admonitions of the Blessed Beauty.” (‘Abdu’l-Baha, “Selections from the Writings of ‘Abdu’l-Baha”, page 126 and “Baha’i Readings” from Canada for 25th September).

“10:32 Give none offence, neither to the Jews, nor to the Gentiles, nor to the church of God: 10:33 Even as I please all men in all things, not seeking mine own profit, but the profit of many, that they may be saved.” (King James Bible, 1 Corinthians)

Mission India:- “We live in a “what’s in it for me” culture. But that philosophy only ends in brokenness and pain. What can you do for others today? How can what you do impact their salvation?”

Daily:- “Have you been wanting to start hitting the gym more frequently, or just biking, running or walking more? Now is the time to get started — your energy is perfect for creating self-discipline.”

Single’s:- “If you’re feeling impatient about a romantic possibility, try making a move yourself. Ask them to do something low-pressure with you. At least, you should be able to move yourself forward in one way or another.” 21:58, 24/9:- 7 is in Crete, 8 belongs to an incompatible theology, and I am not allowed to contact 6, and my heart is still with 6. So, tomorrow, looks like the sky, overcast, chilly and gray, and after an indifferent look around the market, I’ll go home and probably go to sleep. In such an empty place, all that is left is my pillow, my heart and my imagination. 09:08, 25/9:- its bright and sunny, but without No 6, it might as well be a blizzard when I feel gutted to be without her like this.

Couple’s:- “You’re feeling a little strange, but it could end up being a very good thing indeed. Let your mood guide you, and don’t worry so much about getting everything exactly right.”

Daily Forecast:- Same as yesterday, Love:- “When the subject of ‘baggage’ inevitably comes up, don’t look away. You’re guilty as charged. Explain that one good experience can erase it all, and you just might have a case.” 12:09, 25/9:- Exactly, that’s what I’m been trying to put over for decades, but no one is listening. All I need is for one particular woman to heal me, and then we can both get on with the rest of our lives, together. Energy and Career, the same as yesterday.

1361) Published: Journal: 24/9/10, Hopelessly Devoted September 23, 2010

Posted by pete1844 in Journal.
add a comment
Istiqlal, 17th ‘Izzat, 167 BE
The Independence and Sovereignty of Might
Friday, 24th September, 2010 AD
.
1361) 24/9/10, Hopelessly Devoted
.
Blog Stats for 24/9:-
.
Today’s Plan:-
09:30 to c.12:30, ITQ
13:00 to c.15:00, MECO salat al-jumu’ah and khutbah (Friday prayers and sermon from Dr Taj Hargey)
.

“Whatever hath befallen you, hath been for the sake of God. This is the truth, and in this there is no doubt. You should, therefore, leave all your affairs in His Hands, place your trust in Him, and rely upon Him. He will assuredly not forsake you. In this, likewise, there is no doubt. No father will surrender his sons to devouring beasts; no shepherd will leave his flock to ravening wolves. He will most certainly do his utmost to protect his own.

If, however, for a few days, in compliance with God’s all-encompassing wisdom, outward affairs should run their course contrary to one’s cherished desire, this is of no consequence and should not matter. Our intent is that all the friends should fix their gaze on the  11  Supreme Horizon, and cling to that which hath been revealed in the Tablets.” (Baha’u’llah, cited by the Universal House of Justice, December 1983 and “Baha’i Readings” from Canada for 24th September and in the compilation, “Fire and Light”, page 10)

“27:6 Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.” (King James Bible, Proverbs)

Mission India:- “Perhaps a friend has said some hard words to your face – words that spoke the truth but words that hurt. Be thankful. Your enemies speak kind words to your face but lies behind your back. How are you at receiving “words” from a friend?”

Daily:- “Take a closer look at your health today. You may find that your energy is better spent on dealing with the details of your care and feeding, rather than the big-picture stuff everyone else is focused on.”

Single’s:- “The universal energy is incredibly busy right now, so rather than joining in, you may want to take a step back. When it comes to your love life, try practicing random acts of kindness instead of pushing your agenda.”

Couple’s:- “Spending time with your darling is fantastic, but you also need the moral support of your friends. Call some old pals and arrange a get-together. You’ll get a fresh sense of energy that’ll boost your relationship, too.” 09:36, 24/9:- I feel that inner child’s needs as a 7 year old, craving her presence, company, embrace as if I need her like Oxygen. I miss her terribly. She’s on my mind as well as in my heart every second of every day, as well as deeply under my skin. I love her, and everything about her.

Daily Forecast:- “Imagination, Creativity and Fun”:- “There’s nothing about your behavior at the moment that can be described as even remotely normal. Fortunately, you’re going to love every minute of it. If anyone actually has the nerve to ask what’s up, there’s only one thing to say: You’re exploring with your inner child — and loving every minute!” Love:- Same as yesterday. Energy:- “You’re about to learn the true meaning of the expression ‘wired for sound.’ You’ll be excited, amped and running on high. Fortunately, your new fans will really appreciate it.” Career:- Same as yesterday.

1360) Published: Journal: 23/9/10, Hard-working and Enthusiastic September 22, 2010

Posted by pete1844 in Journal.
add a comment
Istijlal, 16th ‘Izzat, 167 BE
The Majesty and Honour of Might
Thursday, 23rd September, 2010 AD
.
1360) 23/9/10, Hard-working and Enthusiastic
.
Blog Stats for 23/9:-
6 looks at the Home Page
1 look at “1281) SU, Chilly Robots and Hot People (17 6 10)”
1 look at “1352) Journal, 19/9/10, A Trinity of Church (18 9 10)”
1 look at “1203) Non-Me, Lazos Learning Lesson 3 (12 3 10)”
.
Today’s Plan:-
09:30 to 15:00 ITQ, went well

“In Mazindaran a vast number of the servants of God were exterminated. The Governor, under the influence of calumniators, robbed a great many of all that they possessed. Among the charges he laid against them was that they had been laying up arms, whereas upon investigation it was found out that they had nothing but an unloaded rifle! Gracious God! This people need no weapons of destruction, inasmuch as they have girded themselves to reconstruct the world. Their hosts are the hosts of goodly deeds, and their arms the arms of upright conduct, and their commander the fear of God. Blessed that one that judgeth with fairness. By the righteousness of God! Such hath been the patience, the calm, the resignation and contentment of this people that they have become the exponents of justice, and so great hath been their forbearance, that they have suffered themselves to be killed rather than kill, and this notwithstanding that these whom the world hath wronged have endured tribulations the like of which the history of the world hath never recorded, nor the eyes of any nation witnessed. What is it that could have induced them to reconcile themselves to these grievous trials, and to refuse to put forth a hand to repel them? What could have caused such resignation and serenity? The true cause is to be found in the ban which the Pen of Glory hath, day and night, chosen to impose, and in Our assumption of the reins of authority, through the power and might of Him Who is the Lord of all mankind.” (Baha’u’llah, “Epistle to the Son of the Wolf”, pages 74 to 75 and “Baha’i Readings” from Canada for 23rd September)

“12:24 Consider the ravens: for they neither sow nor reap; which neither have storehouse nor barn; and God feedeth them: how much more are ye better than the fowls? 12:25 And which of you with taking thought can add to his stature one cubit? 12:26 If ye then be not able to do that thing which is least, why take ye thought for the rest? 12:27 Consider the lilies how they grow: they toil not, they spin not; and yet I say unto you, that Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.” (King James Bible, Luke)

Mission India:- “This day has hardly begun and perhaps you are already piling on the worry. (Nope!) Work worry. People worry. School worry. Let it go or do something about it. (NHS worry?) Give it to God or ask God to help you with it. But just don’t sit and worry. Its a waste of time. What things are on your worry .;lost today?” 07:32, 22/9:- I’m worried about being emotionally and psychologically wound up, manipulated, auto-suggested, psy-opped, or otherwise made to feel threatened, intimidated, angry, on a war-footing, defensive, offended, slighted, demeaned, humiliated, or otherwise psychologically undermined by the likes of NHS personnel or Baha’i “friends” who do not know how to get the best out of me, or are determined not to. Luckily, such people are few and far between, and, apart from my doctor and CPN, I can easily avoid them, or otherwise tell them effectively to piss off. The NHS though is quite persistent, and a constant thorn in my side. 07:13, 23/9:- And how often in the past as well as here, have my fears been exaggerated by my imagination and when tested against reality have been found to be as real as the vapour of a mirage in the desert!

Daily:- “Things could get pretty ugly today if you allow conflict to flare up. Try to ensure that you’re keeping the peace as much as you can — especially at work, though pretty much everywhere you go.”

Single’s:- “Your big mission for the moment is to set your romantic ambitions aside and just meet new people solely on their own terms. Enjoy life for all its variety, beauty, humor and new potential.” 07:20, 22/9:- Well, I’m not letting an underlying commitment to 6 from stopping me pursuing friendship with 7 and 8 and enjoying that immensely. 23:33, 23/9:- Had a nice chat with a friend in Bristol, who’s having a hard time, though my hyper-manic creativity noticed so many “associations” and “ideas of reference” in what she said, that I wonder if its all a lesson in something totally different from what appears to be true at face value. But casting aspersions of her transparency might cause offense, so I’m leery about exploring the associations or possibilities here. But the suggestivity of elements of No 6 mirrored in her were marked and striking. But speculation without any facts is perilous, though very tantalizing and tempting. This method of communication through analogies with a total absence of empirical facts or information is very compelling, challenging, seductive, enthralling, fascinating, dangerous, tempting, irresistible, and I feel that not to be led on by it, is NOT an option, since a person clever enough to pull this off, is a woman in a million, and IF she is interested enough in me to devote such elaborate planning to training me in this way, there is no way I will turn down her invitation to play this game of charades. If its not real, and just a set of amazing coincidences, then the Concourse on High will have the last laugh. If it is real, I want her by my side asap and the rest of eternity. Do I make myself clear?

Couple’s:- “You can’t wait to get started. Your sweetheart thinks you’re wasting time even saying those words. You two know just what you want to do next and you have exactly the mix of energies to make it happen.” 07:17, 23/9:- What, a waste of time constantly asking, “Are We There Yet?” I know what I would like, and I know what I’d like you to want, but do you? I just don’t know, though based on empirically rational scientific logic, you’re not interested, end of. But what if you have “underlying” feelings for me that you haven’t admitted to yet, as my intuition suspects but cannot prove through reality checking and for which I can offer not a shred of verifiable evidence? IF you secretly feel abundant affection for me, as I for you, then indeed, we two know just what we want, and have all the resources to make it happen, and be fulfilled, “when the time is right”. “You have control!” And my heart is moved yet again to declare, “I love you!” You’re not a mere number; you’re a free woman!

Daily Forecast:- “Touchy, touchy!” “The easy thing to do is to forget how well you were brought up, and let the cause of your irritation and frustration have it right between the eyes. Unfortunately, as you already know, it’s not the right thing — and you won’t feel good about yourself afterward. Kickboxing, anyone?” Love, Energy and Career as before. 23:44, 23/9:- Do I feel irritated? no, not at all. I feel engaged in a process by a genius of a woman well-versed in training adults using methods that are so intriguing as to beggar the imagination. I’m learning to live in an environment, where the boundaries between fact and fantasy are so porous as to cease to exist. And the uncertainty of “proof” is no longer either an issue or a problem. I can live comfortably with uncertainty, since the result of the “experiment” is not yet discernible. We both know the result we’re looking for, and we both have the patience to await the final result, when its time is right and ripe, and we’re both enjoying the journey on the way there, immensely. Nearly time again for bed, and a passionate cuddle with my pillow.

1359) Published: Journal: 22/9/10, Are We There Yet? September 21, 2010

Posted by pete1844 in Journal.
add a comment
‘Idal, 15th ‘Izzat, 167 BE
The Justice and Questions of Might
Wednesday, 22nd September, 2010 AD
.
1359) 22/9/10, Are We There Yet?
.
Blog Stats for 22/9:-
3 looks at the Home Page
1 look at “1359) Journal, 22/9/10, Are We There Yet? (21/9/10)”
.
Today’s Plan:-
10.00 to 11:30 Interview Skills with Stella Matthews at Pathways to Work/Shaw Trust in Headington, went well
13:00 to 16:00 MIND drop-in at the Kaleidoscope Centre in Kidlington about money management, went well
16:00 to c.16:30 CPN Sandy Tresise at home, went well
17:30 to c.18:30 Phil Halmarack at Restore in Manzil Way, about a prospective psychodrama series of workshops on relationships, went well
c.19:15 plus dinner with Hilary?, went well

“O Shaykh! This people have passed beyond the narrow straits of names, and pitched their tents upon the shores of the sea of renunciation. They would willingly lay down a myriad lives, rather than breathe the word desired by their enemies. They have clung to that which pleaseth God, and are wholly detached and freed from the things which pertain unto men. They have preferred to have their heads cut off rather than utter one unseemly word. Ponder this in thine heart. Methinks they have quaffed their fill of the ocean of renunciation. The life of the present world hath failed to withhold them from suffering martyrdom in the path of God.” (Baha’u’llah, “Epistle to the Son of the Wolf”, page 74)

“2:1 Now the days of David drew nigh that he should die; and he charged Solomon his son, saying, 2:2 I go the way of all the earth: be thou strong therefore, and shew thyself a man; 2:3 And keep the charge of the LORD thy God, to walk in his ways, to keep his statutes, and his commandments, and his judgments, and his testimonies, as it is written in the law of Moses, that thou mayest prosper in all that thou doest, and whithersoever thou turnest thyself: 2:4 That the LORD may continue his word which he spake concerning me, saying, If thy children take heed to their way, to walk before me in truth with all their heart and with all their soul, there shall not fail thee (said he) a man on the throne of Israel.” (King James Bible, 1 Kings)

Mission India: “Perhaps you had a parent that said words like this to you . If so, praise God and carry on. If not, then these are God’s special words for you today. Did your parents ever challenge you with words like this?” 06:54, 22/9:- My father’s advice was to look after No 1, to not be found out, to refuse to let the bastards grind me down, to assure physical survival at all costs, my mother’s advice was tacit, to live as she lived, to follow her rock-hard, determined, mystical Anglican foundation. I followed my mum, and before her, her father, my Grandpa, Victor Rose, whose example, though tacit, was immeasurably more powerful than all the diatribes from my father’s mouth which said do as I say, not as I do. If physical survival was so important to him, why did he trust the NHS with his cancer, and do nothing in his lifetime to have a healthy lifestyle? My mother and her father said very little, but their example spoke volumes. My mother tacitly told me to hold to God’s truth, to have integrity and honesty, and to pay no heed to the clamour of the worldly-wise, to be detached from all things, and above all to love God, beauty, truth, peace, love, to disregard the foolish ones who wield temporal power, such as the media, peer pressure, the irreligious, the immoral, the fashionable, the majority.

Daily:- “Art is on your mind in a big way today, and you should make sure that you’re either creating it or experiencing it. Your great energy is perfect for making life more beautiful for those around you.” 07:02, 22/9:- Well, I’ve been listening to Kate Bush’s “The Sensual World” non-stop for the last few days. I’m told my company is “brilliant”, so at least some people enjoy being around me. 08:16, 22/9:- Perhaps the artistic creativity inherent in psychodrama will bear good fruit, in terms of exploring the emotional issues at the core of my relationship problems, such as worshiping the Goddess and feeling gutted when She abandons me.

Single’s:- “You’re likely to be dealing with extremes today, but it’s likely that the truth and your true emotions aren’t really far from one side or the other. Avoid bold romantic risks while you’re in this mood!”

Couple’s:- “”It’s hard not to take your sweetie pie’s behavior personally, but the truth is that each person is a whole universe unto himself and herself as well as being part of a couple. If they’re ready to talk about it, they will.” 07:04, 22/9:- 6, 7 and 8 all keep their cards close to their chests, and why not? They are all self-possessed, feisty, independent-minded, free-thinking women, the sort I adore, so why wouldn’t they keep their own counsel, and not trust me with their every secret thought. They own themselves, I do not, and that’s how it should be. If they want to talk to me and share, they are welcome, but if not, that is their prerogative, right, and privilege, and anyway, their being mysterious and secretive makes them more alluring to me, and they know that, in spades.

Daily Forecast:- Energy:-“Start — or resume — your exercise regimen now, while you’re feeling ten feet tall and bulletproof. You’ll make your mirror proud in a few short weeks.” 07:11, 22/9:- Whaddya mean? My exercise regimen never stopped, though I suppose it DID take a back seat for a few days when I had some duvet days recently. Still, its now in full swing, I’m cycling between Oxford and Kidlington 4 times today. Entries under “Emotional Alert”, “Love” and “Career” are all the same as yesterday.